25 August 2007

Fraud, waste and abuse

A better employee than me would never think of blogging from work. However, it's Saturday and there's really no good reason for me to be here.

Well, actually, there is. Someone has to talk to the lunatics.

Thus far I have had:
A - A team of yahoos up in New York City so lost it took two of them, in ongoing conversation with one another, to place a phone order for a single object. This is why I avoid taking calls, and why I love be a non-commissioned employee.

B - A man in California who is convinced that Federal Express is out to get him, and that the whole "came out to meet the driver while carrying a rifle" issue was one big misunderstanding. I earned my meager pay talking to this one.

C - A doctor in Florida whose expensive Box-o-Stuff is missing somewhere, and was upset because his other doctor buddy in Florida was driving up from a different city to share in the Crate-o-Goodness. He had no way to contact his buddy and tell him the box wasn't there, because apparently doctors in Florida do not have cellphones.

D - A vigorous discussion among my coworkers on whether or not selling a man a crate of soft point ammo when he'd asked for lead round nose was a Bad Thing. This discussion would have been over much more quickly if anyone working today except me knew the difference. And although my employer Shall Not Be Named On The Blog, trust me - people working here should know the difference.

Lot of crazy people out there. And lots of confused ones, too. And the most entertaining thing is - I have no clue. You call me, you can tell me anything. Chances are, I'll believe you.

Once in a while, when I get off the phone with someone, I ask myself, "was that guy totally full of it, and did I just get bent over?"

Sometimes, I'm sure the answer is yes. Sometimes even a resounding yes. But I do get the occasional call from someone, usually when I've replaced an item lost-in-shipping, to tell the original has showed up and they now have two items, but only paid for one. These folks invariably want to either send one back or pay me, which is display of integrity that often catches me off guard but is still always pleasing.

That'll do for now. If I do more posting on my employer's dime, I'll try to NOT have it be about my tiresome day.