Twitchy...

I've been waking up with that heaviness in my chest. Not coughing, just heavy.

Last week I was running around the park. I was sucking wind - hard. I thought, "Jesus, this sucks."

Then I realized I had a carton of Marlboros at the house. As I ran along, I thought, "why don't I just finish that carton and call it good?"

I've been smoking Marlboro Reds for...12 years? Something like that. And I am not a light smoker.

So I decided that's what I'd do. Finish the carton, and that would be it. I won't buy any more.

Well, here I am with 16 cigarettes left in the last pack. I stopped at the pharmacy and bought jawbreakers, mints and sugarless gum. I also bought one pack of Marlboro Ultralights.

At some point in the next 24-36 hours, I'll be out of my faithful Reds. I've been practicing some, not taking cigarettes when I leave the house (because smoking and driving, folks, that is the best). I'll stretch the end of the Reds as long as I can.

Then I'll stretch the pack of Ultralights as long as I can. Hey - if I can make them last two weeks, that's fine.

But I think I may be able to do this. There's nobody here to receive the full force of my bitchiness other than the dogs, so that's a definite plus.

So...if the rants here take on a certain...enraged and bitter tone, you've been warned.