30 April 2007

Sign me up

For the clinical trial.

Now, I'm not a Cosmo-type gal, but I enjoy picking between sizes 6 and 8 rather than 10 and 12. I put in some effort to be able to do that, though.

I'd love to be able to put in less effort, though. Effort sucks. And this pill...

...the animals also ate around a third less food than they normally would.

But that's not the primary draw...

The hormone-releasing pill has so far only been given to female monkeys and shrews who displayed more mating behaviour and ate less.

Now, of course, it can't just be the Fun Skinny More Sex pill, so they have to issue a disclaimer:

a psychologist said low-libido was usually caused by relationship issues.

Well, duh. But the pill that might make it possible to overlook the fact that the man in your life has spent the last nine hours on the couch giggling at his own farts?

If this shit actually works out, it'll be the fastest drug in history to be FDA approved and to be entirely covered by every insurance plan in America.

Then, of course, two years after approval, we'll learn it causes eyelid cancer and excessive hair growth on the elbows. But know what? Nobody will give a damn.

Good job, British scientists!