24 April 2007

Generally pissed off

I find I'm incapable of breaking down all the various war-related domestic news and addressing each topic individually these days. In all honestly, I'm disgusted past the point of speech. I just want to spit.

So I'm just going to open CNN in a second window and bitch my way down the page, more or less.

We've got these Pat Tillman/Jessica Lynch hearings going on. Jesus Christ. I am occasionally forced to wonder if the Army can do anything right. I used to not understand the purpose behind the echelons of command that are packed full of field-grade and above officers and senior NCO's making slideshows. Now I do. We have to do something with these people to keep them off the actual battlefield, or all our soldiers would instantly die. If a rifle company commander had his head as far up his ass the people in the decision-making chains on these two incidents...

Seriously - what fucktard thought the appropriate thing to do with the Tillman incident was lie with great creativity? Friendly fire happens, folks. Always has, always will. The appropriate thing to do would have been a release stating simply that Tillman had been killed "during combat operations," then a private meeting with the family to explain that it had been a friendly fire incident. I might not have even gone that far. KIA. One of the honorable fallen. Examine the situation to see what we can do to ensure it doesn't happen again, then keep marching. End of story.

Listen, guys, hint one. Bad shit cannot be made into good shit. The best thing an organization can do with bad shit is make it go away. The best way to do this is with a short, factual press release to defuse the situation. We then take all the details (no, Major, we don't HIDE them), and put them somewhere where they can be found. Ideally, we've already got a policy somewhere (written well in advance) saying that to spare families excessive pain, we do not publicize fratricide, although each and every occurance is reviewed for future improvement.

And Lynch? Good lord. I do not understand the number of people who seem to despise this young lady. Actually, I do - I simply choose to believe they're retarded. Listen - training wasn't up to snuff, NCO supervision was apparently not up to snuff, they were saddled with one of those officers the Army apparently doesn't bother training for a combat environment (because said officer's "branch" is not a combat arm - in the Army, this means these people are immune from hostile action. Betcha didn't know that).

Anyway, she is not the one to blame for this. I've never heard her claim to be anything other than what she was, and I have several times seen/heard her try to deflect any praise to those soldiers she was with who did fight like tigers.

The Army is the most Public Affairs-challenged of the services. Once upon a time I worked in PAO for the Marine Corps, and I am not full of it when I tell you that the Corps has it right, and the Army is eight kinds of fucked-up.

You know, back in PAO school, when we had our separate classes by service, the Marine instructors used to beat into us that our policy was (with the exception of anything that included the word "nuclear") "maximum exposure, minimum delay." The media asked, we answered. They wanted a subject matter expert? We found one. Might be a lance corporal, might be lieutenant colonel. The Marine Corps gambled that the American Public loved its Marines, and would forgive them their errors if we told them the truth. For the most part, that works.

Long ago the Marine Corps admitted that the country doesn't need the Corps, the country wants the Corps. And their entire PAO stance is geared toward that. The Army...discourages its frontline people from talking to the media, makes the embed process painful, and (as it does in oh-so-many ways), adds layer upon layer of useless staff paperwork and obstinate field grades to the process of getting information out. It's infuriating.

Here's the thing that Army PAO officers don't understand, apparently. Nobody on earth likes staff officers. The only thing more stupid and evil than a field-grade in a staff role is the processes that officer creates and the bright ideas he has. Sir (or Ma'am), if every single thing you do is not geared toward getting ground truth (and "ground truth" doesn't come from a brief) to the American People as quickly, painlessly and often as possible, you are wrong. Don't try to spin, you're not good enough. Don't try to get God and everybody to sign off on your new plan so you get "maximum visibility" for your next OER. Just make it your absolute mission every day in the war to get the truth to the people. And yes, you have to use the media to do it.

Soldiers are every bit as fabulous and amazing and brave and goodhearted as Marines. It drives me nuts that the Army PAO machine is so terrified of having a PV2 smoke on camera or say "the wrong thing" that their stories don't get out as well as the stories of their Marine brethren.

Tillman and Lynch - both decent soldiers done wrong by their Army. Do better, Army. We're watching.

OK. Next. Harry Reid.

"I believe ... that this war is lost, and this surge is not accomplishing anything, as is shown by the extreme violence in Iraq this week," Reid told journalists.

I don't even know what to say. We can argue. I can say the surge is pretty definitely accomplishing something, but since it's not even in full swing yet, we don't really know if it's going to do the trick or not. I can say that last I checked, we don't base long-term strategy on a week's headlines from a combat zone.

Or I can say what in the Hell is this asshole talking about?!? Harry Reid is from Nevada. I thought people in Nevada were fairly sane. Can't you recall this guy or something? Jesus H. Christ on a stick. We've got the Speaker of the House meeting with the actual Forces of Goddam Evil, and we've got the Senate Majority Leader randomly declaring defeat because...I don't know. Because the President is a Republican? Because he truly believes he's been elected to orchestrate a defeat? Tell me, tell me please, that one of the most important positions in our government is not held by someone who thinks a particularly bad VBIED is cause for surrender.

Fukkit. Harry's worn out, folks, so let's call it a day. Afghanistan is also hard, so let's throw in the towel there. We've had some folks in the Horn of Africa for a while, and there hasn't been a formal Declaration of Victory there, either. Bring 'em home. We've some Guardsmen on the borders, but we've still got illegal aliens, so the Hell with that. Send them home. Let's dismantle the Border Patrol, too. Poor guys, probably wish they had more time to barbecue with their families. Coast Guard pulled a huge cocaine bust recently, so we're obviously not winning the War on Drugs either. Mothball the cutters and eliminate the DEA.

Aren't you glad this guy didn't have any power when we were fighting the Civil War? Or after Wake Island fell? What would Nancy Pelosi sound like speaking German with an Alabama accent? Harry Reid would've taken one look at the disgraceful lack of mittens at Valley Forge and immediately began holding talks with Cornwallis and Burgoyne

I just do not know, people. Our soldiers and Marines (and sailors and airmen) are amazing. Most of our military leadership is sharp, flexible, clear-eyed and willing to keep adjusting fire to maintain momentum.

But our political leadership is disgraceful. Our Republicans are still on my shit list for the amount of time it took to admit we were on the wrong track. And the Democrats...I just don't get it.

What I heard from the 2006 election was, "do it right. do it better. finish it." I did not hear "let's lose. let's give up. defeat is the goal!"

Maybe I heard the wrong thing. Sometimes I wonder. Maybe I just missed the memo when our country lost its collective mind and gave up.

Oh well. I'm still pissed, so I'm going to go run around the park or walk a dog or something.